I’ve officially lived long enough to know what constitutes a good day. Or, at least what’s in my control when it comes to having a good day.
Lately I’ve been living my life guided by the letter M (“Music” is one of the "M's" which is great because my new album, Eulogy Vol. 1, is out TODAY!) I’ve found that if I hit these five “M’s” my chances of having a decent day go up exponentially:
MOVE –I wish good moods and optimal health could be achieved by scrolling through Instagram. But it’s not to be. I’ve got to move every day, or what the mythologist Martin Shaw describes as “making a daily covenant with discomfort.” If I don’t remind myself that I have a body every day, I become a brain propped up by bones. I need to re-inhabit my body. To become embodied. To stare down my sloth. My mood improves immeasurably when I take all that energy that’s been buzzing around in my skull and distribute it throughout my body. It doesn’t even take much. I’m not training to be a Navy Seal. I just have to move enough to reacquaint myself with my body, to wake it up and say hello.
MAKE – As in “make” things. I’m not shooting for the moon here, I’m just trying to make creativity a non-negotiable part of my day. One good sentence or lyric or bit of dialogue counts as a victory. Making things is anti-depressive for me. If I gesture even the smallest bit towards the creative aspect of myself rather than the content-consuming aspect of myself, it’s like some pressure valve gets released in my brain. I’m reminded that creativity is the air I breathe, the waters in which I most happily swim. I don’t believe you have to be a professional artist to benefit massively from the ‘make.’ It could be art but it could also be a meal. Making something from nothing puts me in touch with my generative power. It reminds me that I have that power and when I use it every day – however modestly – I feel better.
MEDITATE – I used to be a very diligent twice-daily meditator and my practice has fallen off in recent years. I’m still very much of a meditation evangelist – if someone asks for advice, it’s one of the first things I recommend. Learning how to meditate (I do TM, or Transcendental Meditation) in my late-20’s provided a massive shift in my life and surely kept me sane in the early years of How I Met Your Mother when so much of the ground beneath my feet felt like it was shifting. I’ve been feeling like it’s time to reignite my daily practice. The relief I feel when I simply stop, close my eyes and allow myself to go inward cannot be overstated. My days are simply better when I meditate.
MEET – This could be therapy, a 12-step meeting, my weekly men’s group, lunch with a friend. It’s about engagement, real time eye contact with real people. The older I get I’m finding it more and more important to be witnessed, to have my thoughts heard and my feelings acknowledged by someone other than a partner or blood relation. Someone with at least some objectivity, who can either affirm my narrative or gently let me know that I’ve lost the plot. And I can do the same for others. “Living life in consultation” is one of many wise 12-step precepts. It’s folly to assume I always know best. Sometimes the simple act of sharing, of letting someone in on the thoughts or obsessions rattling around inside my head is often enough to help me pause and not act rashly. And feel connected to others. “Meet” is an antidote to loneliness.
MUSE – This is time to dream, to imagine, to take a walk or stare at the wall and emerge with nothing to show for myself but maybe the seeds of an idea (I don’t even need to emerge with that...) For me, proper musing has to involve a break from screens. I can muse to music (instrumental or lyrics in a foreign language are best) but could not muse to a podcast (that’s other people doing the musing…) Long drives are great for musing as are long walks. It’s a space absent goals, logistics, and social media. It’s harnessing the energy of a kid lying on her back staring up at the sky and watching clouds drift by. By removing any kind of agenda or distraction, I open myself up to patience, calm, and inspiration..
MUSIC – Music, for me, is medicine. I gotta listen to some or make some every day. And speaking of music....
Eulogy: Volume 1 is out in the world today!! (Volume 2 will be out in a few months...) I’m intensely proud of the album and so excited for people to hear the tunes. Please give them a spin wherever you spin music these days and if it lands, please spread the word.
Why is the album called "Eulogy?" At some point during the recording process I had the realization that each track in its own way was about death. If not a literal death then a metaphorical one. A song cycle of mini-funerals, burying and honoring the parts of myself that were once essential and necessary but no longer serving me. An album about time, love, loss, death, identity, grief, and surrender. And ultimately rebirth and redemption.
Enormous, unending thanks to my genius collaborators Jeremiah Dunlap, Cory "Volunteer" Quintard, and Kyle Cox. A special shoutout to songbird Audrey Assad whose voice brought some serious magic to many tracks. And to Jon Marro for creating the most gorgeous art for the album and the singles.
And if you live in or near Chicago, DC, or Los Angeles please come see the final shows of my mini-tour.
What are some other "M's" that you all might add to the six listed above? I can think of a few more: MAGIC, MYSTERY, MYTH. As I sing in "Real Life," one of the tracks on Eulogy:
I will call upon the mystical the magical the fanciful illogical and pray
I will open up to mythic maps and miracles
To holy words that frightened people say
Only mystery is big enough to meet us
To forgive us and to heal us today
~Josh